The scale of opportunity

More blog-searching today (and somehow this is a productive day at work) and I found a "trailing spouse" blog, albeit an expat* one.  She doesn't like the term trailing spouse either**, but her blog is endlessly positive:

As a trailing spouse, identity can be a tough thing (because if you're like me, that last thing you want to be called is a "trailing spouse"). But if the career you had before isn't going to work out abroad (or you lose yours via a layoff like me), maybe there's something else you'd love to do and try. Maybe, in fact, this is your big opportunity for that something you used to put on hold. 

Chantal at One Big Yodel 

I don't want my opportunity, a positive thing, tinged with the fact that I only have it because it's the consolation prize for having no control***.  Here's my internalized misogyny (it's just popping up way too much this week) again, in that I can't see my worth if I didn't come to it myself, as if taking that opportunity is just backsliding into a dependent female role. I don't, however, feel this way when it comes to education.  If J was working and I was going back to school or taking classes in whatever field I settle on, that feels ok. But if it's to start an Etsy or make Halloween costumes (traditionally female pursuits) it's not.  See what I did there?  Thanks world.  You've made me a woman-hater.

How do I cleanse my mind of these tendencies?  I feel fucked all-around.  And I haven't even touched upon the stink of privilege in all this.

*I'm more interested in domestic relocation.
**Yeah, I changed my title again, because no one's going to find this blog otherwise.
***I'm speaking for myself, not Chantal.  She has her shit together.

Spotlight on Awesome: First Stitch on Etsy

I've written about how easy it is to avoid making friends when you know you're going to move, but jumping back in has so many more rewards than downsides.  The women I've met in the past six months have been integral to staying sane, and I like to think I've helped them, also.  Maybe it's because we're older, but there is such a show of emotion and affection between us, it is almost my reaction to be cynical and not take it as sincere.  I have friends that want hugs and say "I love you!"?  I realized how jaded I must be if I questioned the sincerity of truly sweet communication.  Hugs all around!

One lady, specifically, who has helped me in my crazy life, is my friend Anca.  She's got a Masters in Fiber Arts, so you know I am taking advantage of her skills as much as I can.  She encourages me to make things, teaches me how to do them better, and is helping me add to my insane list of future projects.  Yesterday we took a trip to Joann Fabric and had to keep pulling each other back from the brink of Craft Addiction.  "Sculpey is 50% off! Let's get 10 of 'em!" "But we don't need it?" "But it's half off!*!!!"  We did end up using the Sculpey, and I wish I had a picture of the little mushrooms she made. Adorable!

I do have pictures from her new Etsy site, First Stitch.

The felt balls are wonderful as decorative pieces, but I use mine as a fashionable pin-cushion as shown above.  She also makes small clutch purses:

I have the honor of seeing some of these first products come out at our weekly Craft Nights (makin' therapy).  But Etsy is hard until you can get some traffic there.  I had an account for a little while (and actually sold a few little things) but it requires dedication to marketing yourself and getting some exposure.  Even though no one else seemed to be selling custom state bird egg bracelets, no one knew I made them so I didn't sell any.  I did not succeed, but I can't stand for these cute, well-made things not getting at least some pageviews.

*Sculpey and Premo are 50% until Sunday, I think. Get it done.http://www.etsy.com/listing/66061335/polka-dot-felt-ball-teal-and-yellow