J. finds an outlet!

Cardamom-apple pancakes with rosewater syrup

Last month, J. and our good neighbor Tuna (also a grad student) decided to have food and movie nights with friends, where they competed with their culinary skills on a specific theme or food.   They want to do a blog, too, where they post pictures of the food and review the movies.  Last week (the second event) was a bread contest, and we watched The Holy Mountain (1973).  The bread (a simple whole wheat boule from J. and a rococo pesto loaf from Tuna) was absolutely delicious.  And the movie didn't make anyone run screaming from the room.  Though it's really just a snacks sort of event, everyone who has come has brought a dish, so it turns into a stone soup/Jesus and the loaves kind of thing.  So nice!

Pesto bread in foreground, J's boule to the left, gulab at the top, and a green bean dish by a Turkish friend that tastes very much like you'd get it in the South!

Other than futzing with his bike, this is J's only organized activity.  And as much as I complain about having to forcibly eject him from the house to go work sometimes, he really needs something that has nothing to do with work.  Both he and Tuna are haggard grad students, so they have that bond as well as friendship.  Though they call it a competition, there's nothing like that going on.  No stress, no winners, no rules.  Just food and good times.

Gulab jamun- fried dough in syrup, from India

I made a batch of galub jamun from a packet, and made the syrup myself.  The dough was not the tastiest part about the dish, but I think the syrup turned out well.  So well, we used the leftovers the next day to pour on our pancakes (highly recommended recipe).

On a whim Monday, I checked the academic and public libraries for the towns J's applied in, and actually found some openings.  They weren't ideal, but I am confident that I can eventually turn a part time job into full-time once I prove myself. Economy be damned!*  To show I was being super positive (I'm still making up for my attitude from the past) I sent J an email with the links.  His response was that he wasn't feeling very positive about his current applications because no one was responding to his last email.  It's the beginning of the semester, so I think it's just people being busy.  I hated to hear him sounding sad, and I really didn't mean to exacerbate that with my email.  He's one of the most responsible, level-headed people I know, so sometimes it's hard to remember that he's feeling uncertain and scared, too.

*Please don't ruin my delusions.

New Year's like a Phoenix

I'd like to think I came through the threshold of 2011 like a phoenix, on fire and ready to be reborn, but really I just had the worst hangover of my life (4 drinks! I am serious!) and didn't manage to form complete sentences until 6pm the next day.  On the 31st, I decided that I'd eat more raw food and end the year with a completely raw meal (spring rolls and sun dried tomato brazil nut "cheese") but on the 1st I had a fried cheese melt from Denny's dipped in ranch.  Nothing on earth was going to get me to eat cheese with a Z.  I needed fried.

Other than the horrendous pain and lost time, New Year's was super fun.  I got to wear a cool outfit, go to several parties and hang out with lots of friends.  J. got a little grouchy (he's not as much about parties) but by the end of the night everyone went to bed happy. (How they woke up is another story).

We did end the year with some bad news on the job-search front.  J. sent in an application to Colorado over a month ago, and also got work back from a possible job in Ohio around the same time.  Has his advisor written/sent his rec letters yet? No.  J. tried emailing him several times, stuck around his office trying to catch him, but to no result.  J. was pretty disconsolate a few days ago and thought that this apparent disregard for him getting a job was going to cost him the Colorado one.  It's not his fault, but it makes him look bad.  The deadline for the Colorado application has already passed, so it's not a point in his favor if his is incomplete.

He had to send an email to the Ohio job to see if they had all his letters (since his advisor wouldn't even answer an email about whether he had sent it).  The answer was no, and J. tried to be as diplomatic as he could without saying outright his advisor was practically M.I.A.  He tried to get in touch some more, tried to convince himself that it was just the end of the semester/holiday time and things were going slow, but eventually we tried to convince each other that something horrible had happened and that's why there was no letter.  J. got an email a few days ago from the Ohio researcher asking about the letter, and he forwarded that to his advisor.  Guess who finally replied!  Seems there was some vague emergency, and he is now "working on it".

It's making me very nervous, and I can't imagine what's happening in J's head right now.  He's working as hard as he can, and is asking for the bare minimum.  There's nothing I can do really, and that's frustrating.

Also annoying: people asking me where I want to go.  It's a nicety, I know, but do they not understand the concept that I am not the engineer of this move? I don't want to get back into the negative rut of saying, "It doesn't matter where I want to go," but that's the truth, isn't it? Stop asking me!!

My boss may be cursing out loud in her office, but we've got a holiday coming up, and my husband is officially done with research and in THESIS MODE!!!1!!!!!1111!!!! :)))))))))))  He will be writing, not doing any crazy new things for his advisor, just working on getting done!



But hopefully, he is not feeling like this:

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